A Bunch of Idiots and Their Adventures Through Space - User contributions [en-gb]

The Group

2023-08-11T15:19:44Z

John Bronston: Chebs

The Chebs, currently located in the Wypoc system. The Chebs was initially formed by [[Gary Grey]] to assist on a job he was hired to do, and have continued travelling together after the inconclusive end.

== Members ==
The Chebs currently consists of 5 members, all of which are original members. They are:

* [[Gary Grey]]
* [[Jeremy Jeremy]]
* [[John Bronston|John "Sausage" Bronston]]
* [[Qenzh Erreqif]]
* [[Steve Connors]]

== History ==

=== Formation ===
The Chebs was formed by [[Gary Grey]]. Originally to aid him in delivering a crate he was hired to deliver to K'kirka by Benjamin Blue, a contact of his. The Chebs were to meet an unnamed individual in a mining colony cafeteria at 8am who was to take the crate off of them, but the individual never showed. Some members of the Chebs (notably Connors and Erreqif) continued to wait for this rendezvous at 8am for the next week, whilst others began to give up hope and retired to their rooms, or to other activities around the K'kirka town.

=== K'kirka ===
K'kirka is a planet primarily inhabited by workers of mining corporations, and virtually all traffic to the planet is commercial. The cost of living is also very high, for the most part due to the lethal nature of the atmosphere meaning constant life support is required to live. The mining corporations keep wages high enough to afford the expensive cost of living, but too low to easily afford passages on one of the commercial vessels that prefer profitable minerals as cargo. The price of transport from K'kirka compared to wages can be so high that some families have to save for generations to afford just one member passage to a new system.

As time went on, The Chebss situation started to become more dire as the prospect of being able to leave started to become less and less possible due to the high cost of living. After a week of waiting, the Chebs notice a Bwap enter the cafeteria and futilely attempt to hire people for a job. Due to his timid and quiet nature the majority people in the cafeteria did not hear him, and those that did simply did not care. The Chebs approached him, and he identified himself as [[Dalglee Hahsh]], an agent for Lysani Laboratories stationed on K'kirka. After several failed attempts by Qenzh Erreqif to offload the crate onto Hahsh, the Chebs decided to hear him out and take him up on his offer.

==== The Calendula ====
''see [[The Calendula Incident]] for more information''

Hahsh stated that he had lost contact with a science ship chartered by Lysani in orbit around K'kirka, and needed to hire a crew to head up and fix the communications array. He offered extra money for a full report in case anything else had gone wrong, and included passage offworld for the entire Chebs. Hahsh provided the Chebs with vacc suits and an air raft, and they travelled up to the Calendula.

They were unable to contact the ship from the outside, and after a fly by the communications array appeared in tact, so the Chebs boarded the ship from the only free air raft bay. They were immediately alerted to something bigger going on due to signs of struggle, blood, and damage all throughout the inside of the ship. They discovered that the ship had been researching combat drugs, and that some illegal experimentation was being carried out on crew members of other ships that were kidnapped by mercenaries. They also discovered corporate espionage was going on, with lab reports being stolen by the astrogrator [[Harris Slowcombe]] and being transmitted to Butler Chemical, a rival of Lysanis. Butler finally ordered Slowcombe to destroy all the evidence, and he set a bomb in the auxillary laboratory. The bomb caused multiple experimental drugs to mix in the air, which was propagated throughout the ship by life support. The drug cocktail caused some members of crew to die instantly, and the others to fly into a murderous rage and kill each other, leaving only 4 survivors. Of the 4 survivors, The Chebs triggered rage flashbacks in 3 of them and injured them to near death.

The Chebs also alerted Slowcombe to their arrival and intent to discover what happened on the ship, causing him to set another bomb in the auxillary laboratory. After incapacitating Slowcombe and a failed disarming attempt, Bronston and Connors decided to take the bomb outside the ship to detonate is harmlessly in space. They succeeded in getting the bomb into the air raft and flying it far enough away to detonate safely, preserving the rest of the ship to investigate for their report.

Upon reaching the pinnace, Bronston and Grey decided to call the incident in to the authorities. After managing to persuade them he was telling the truth, K'kirka ground control enlisted a passing scout vessel to intervene on behalf of the authorities. The Chebs finally met up with the scouts after clearing the entire ship, and Brontson and Grey were left to report to them. They told the scouts everything, including the name and location of their patron Hahsh, and his involvement with Lysani. Grey made the interesting choice to withhold the corporate espionage, protecting Butler Chemical and placing all the blame squarely on Lysani and Hahsh. The Chebs promptly handed over all 4 surviving crew members along with the entire Calendula, and left.

On arrival back on K'kirka, The Chebs made their way straight back to Hahsh to give their report. They told him of the corporate espionage and the bomb, but limited details of the scout involvement to "handing over the crew members to a passing ship for medial attention". Hahsh was not pleased but kept up his end of the bargain, paying the travellers and contacting [[James James]] of [[The Ligma]] to comfirm the passage off world he had on hold for the travelers. Moments after the travelers left Hahsh's office, K'kirka security forces entered and arrested him on the spot.

The Chebs spent several more days on K'kirka, recovering from the Calendula Incident in a medical facility. During this time, Bronston and Jeremy opened the crate they had been charged with delivering. Inside, they discovered a second crate addressed to Regina from K'kirka. Inside this second crate they discovered a load of miscellaneous junk, including candlesticks and several toasters. Subsequent members of crew took turns looking at the crate as they were discharged one by one, and eventually it was discovered that the crate had a false bottom, and concealed below were a couple dozen tubs of a white paste. After some casual observation of the tubs and Bronston tasting the contents, they decided it was likely moisturizer, but were unsure why anyone would to ship it so surreptitiously.

Once all recovered, The Chebs set off on board the Ligma, taking the undelivered crate with them.

=== Wypoc ===
The Ligma was bound for Regina, 4 parsecs away from K'Kirka, so first stopped at Wypoc, a jump-2 system from both. The ship made it to Wypoc and landed without issue. The Chebs decided to disembark and explore the Wypoc startown, first heading through boarder control and customs. Part of these security checks were performed by Sergent Johnson, an officer on duty. Things were going well, until The Chebs deduced Johnson may be a racist. This caused Erreqif to become agitated, and interrogate Johnson on his opinion on psions. As law enforcement on an imperial planet, Johnson was of course required to arrest any psions on behalf of the empire, and this mention made him suspicious. Connors jumped in to try and convince Johnson that everything was alright, but unfortunately he and Erreqif failed to subside Johnsons suspicions and they were both taken to an interrogation room for further questioning. The interrogation stagnated, with both Chebs members managing to keep from incriminating themselves any further, but also not quelling Johnsons suspicions. Eventually, Bronston was able to hack into Johnsons communicator and convince him he was a ranking officer and that Johnson was urgently needed elsewhere, leading to Johnson simply releasing Connors and Erreqif and banning them from entering Wypoc.

The remaining members exited the starport building and headed into Wypoc startown, where they were approached [[Captain Black Star]]. Star offered The Chebs the opportunity for a chance to see a Wypoc Dragon, an extremely dangerous local predator and one of the things Wypoc is most famed for. Grey and Bronston turned down his offer, with Grey citing the lack of reviews of Black Stars services being the reason for declining. The two continued to make their way around star town, visiting [[Bopper Burger]], where Grey notably purchased a [[Mawk]] with ketchup on behalf of Bronston.

==== Illegal Aliens ====
Back aboard the Ligma, Connors and Erreqif bumped into James James, who was offloading cargo. They explained their situation to James, who offered to smuggle them across the boarder in crates. The two accepted this offer, notably opting to share a crate instead of going in separate crates. This crate was a struggle for James to handle alone, and so he enlisted the help or Srj. Johnson to help dismount it from the transport on the other side of the boarder. Johnson remarked on the weight of the crate, asking what was inside, to which James replied "Fugatives". Johnson took this to be a joke and left James and the dismounted crate, allowing James to free Erreqif and Connors into the startown without issue.

Connors and Erreqif met up with the others and investigated the town further. The Chebs headed to Jimmys Vacc Suits, where Bronston ordered a vacc suit with a custom design. Grey also asked Jimmy, the proprietor, for reviews of Star's tours. Jimmy informed him he'd only heard good things about the tours, and so Grey was sold on the idea of going on one of Stars tours. The others filled in the latecomers and they all went off in search of Star to go on a dragon tour

==== The Wypoc Dragon ====
The Chebs found Captain Black Star and agreed to his rate of 30Cr per person. He took them to his 'Land Ship' for the tour. The was actually a double decker bus with wood-like decor adorning the outside, referred to by Star as the 'Iron Maiden'. The Maiden was fitted with an airlock, as is common for passenger vehicles on Wypoc due to the hazardous atmosphere outside of the domed cities. The Chebs met Star's associate, Billy Salt, a young peg-legged lad who fulfilled the role of helmsman (driver), referred to by Star as '1st mate'. The Maiden was also occupied with other passengers, mostly families. The Chebs dispersed aboard the maiden, with most members choosing seats away from each other on the lower deck, but notably with Grey opting to sit on the upper deck. As the Maiden departed, Connors decided to attempt to memorize the route taken.

The Maiden left the city and headed out into the hazardous area surrounding. Star talked for most of this journey, giving general information about Wypoc, species, and notably the dragons. Connors asked several questions about the dragons, determining various useful facts about them. On the journey, they also passed a Pen-Jooin, a kangaroo-like predator with large muscular arms. They witnessed the Pen-Jooin chase down and pounce on a defenseless Greeble, mercilessly punching it to death. The Maiden eventually reached a large cave, and stopped near the mouth. Soon, a pair of read eyes became visible, followed by a dragons head. The dragon breathed fire into the air, and Star ordered Salt to get them out of there immediately. The Maiden rushed away, not being followed by the dragon, and reached the startown with no injuries to anyone on board. The Chebs disembarked with the rest of the passengers, thanking Star for the trip.

==== Retracing Steps ====
Connors and other members of the Chebs wanted to obtain a dragon egg and attempt to raise a pet dragon, and so began preperations to head back to the cave to search for an egg. The first stop was to Jimmys Vacc Suits, to retrieve Bronstons new suit. Whist there, they found out Jimmy and his partner were expecting a child soon, and he was planning on renaming the shop to 'Jimmy and Sons'. The Chebs convinced him that a far better name would be 'Jimmy and Fam', to be far more inclusive towards daughters and other family.

Next, they stopped at Bopper Burger, where Connors purchased a large number of raw patties. Bronston also attempted to seduce the underage girl serving them, mistaking her to be an of-age man.

After this, the Chebs found a vehicle rental place. The met the proprietor, a man called Lesley, and and discussed renting a vehicle. The Chebs stated that the vehicle should have an airlock as a requirement, due to some members not having vacc suits. Lesley informed them that airlocks were only standard on larger vehicles large enough to accommodate them. They were given a good deal on a cheaper bus, due to issues with the buses systems. They were able to drive off without any trouble and made their way out of the startown.

Connors was able to recall the journey with no issue, and the Chebs were soon back at the dragons cave. The dragon did not emerge this time, so Connors and Bronston disembarked to investigate the cave. They discovered that the dragon was a remote controlled animatronic, which they prompty destroyed. The power source of the dragon was a large, egg shaped cell, produced by Butler Chemical. They decided to steal the cell, loading it into their bus. They hid the bus out of sight and waited for the Iron Maiden to appear. They watched in anticipation as the Maiden appeared, only to see no dragon. After a few minutes the Maiden departed, and the Chebs followed, returning to town as fast as they could.

==== Confrontation and Extortion ====
The Chebs made it back to town before Maiden, and prepared themselves where the Maiden usually parks. They got the cell out of the bus, moving the bus out of sight, and all stood around the cell. When the bus turned up they soon got the attention of Star, and even some of the children who were disembarking. Star got the children to leave, and the Chebs began demanding money for the return of the egg. Star reluctantly agreed to pay 3000Cr for the return of the cell, only finding out afterwards that the animatronic dragon 'Bessie' had also been significantly damaged. The Chebs then left an upset and dismayed Star, taking the money and heading back to the Ligma.

==== Return to the Ligma ====
Most members of the Chebs were able to pass through the star port with no issue, however Connors and Erreqif realized they may have some issues due to being on the planet illegally. They initially contacted James James for assistance on returning due to his help smuggling them onto the planet in the first place, but they found he wasn't in a state to help them due to smoking an acrylic-encased plant that was gifted to him by the Chebs on K'Kirka. James sent Keith Lambert to help, who met them outside the star port. Negotiations with Lambert did not go well, due to them not wanting to disclose the reason of them being banned from the planet, and failing to convince Lambert that it was unnecessary to know. Erreqif eventually got fed up of this, and whilst Connors and Lambert were debating, she curled up into a ball on the floor and teleported back to her room on the Ligma, leaving just her clothes behind. Unbeknownst to Errequif, a small boy had witnessed this, and was seen pointing at the spot she previously occupied and exclaiming 'Wow! That lady!'. Due to the illegality of psionics within the empire, Lambert was rather shocked by this, and now had an idea of why they may have been refused entry to the planet. Lambert then took Connors through the starport under the pretense of arresting him, due to an outstanding bounty. Lambert and Connors managed to get through the star port without issue, but the Ligma departed immediately as soon as they were on board, just in case.

==== Leaving Wypoc ====
Having witnessed Erreqifs teleportation, Lambert was now aware that his crew had been illegally transporting a psion through imperial space. Lambert attempted to seize the opportunity by requesting extra money from the Chebs. Discussions between Lambert and Connors went nowhere fast, with Connors steadfastly refusing to give in to Lamberts demands whilst simultaneously failing to provide him with an alternative he would accept. Erreqif attempted to listen in on the negotiations happening in the cargo hold from the hatch to the passenger cabins, but ended up losing her footing and being suspended from her shoelaces whilst dangling through the hatch. Eventually they decided on terms including: Erreqif being suspended in a low berth for the remainder of the journey; the Ligma crew being allowed some items out of the transported crate; and The Chebs and the Ligma crew parting ways at Regina.

=== Regina ===
After a week of travel, the Ligma arrived in the Regina system. Due to Bronstons arrival being anticipated by local authorities, the Ligma was given priority landing and was able to dock almost instantly. All of The Chebss belongings (including the low berth containing Erreqif) were promptly unloaded with help from James. The Chebs were met by 2 local officers, charged with watching them until the Public Order Commission could arrive. The POC officers, led by Chief Inspector Pallod Norrim, took Bronston, Connors and Jeremy off to Norrims office, whilst Grey took the low berth containing Erreqif to a doctor for revival. Grey found a doctor easily, and Erreqif was revived without issue. Erreqif and Grey then proceeded to catch up with the others.

Norrim informed the Chebs that Backetts death was under investigation, and asked if The Chebs knew anyone who would want to hurt him. Bronston decided to use this as an opportunity to incriminate Dalglee Hahsh to Norrim as a potential suspect. Norrim also informed Bronston that he could collect Backetts body, along with a Travel bond of Cr1m to transport Backett back to Allel.

After this meeting, The Chebs decided to leave all of their weapons and other questionable gear in storage in order to make it through customs and down to the moons surface. They were able to make it through customs without issue, and were soon on a shuttle bound for the moons surface. They decided their first order of business was to deliver the crate to its destination. The Chebs headed off to the adjoining town via train, where they then split up. Jeremy split off to do some shopping, whilst the remainder of the Chebs headed to the address on the parcel.

==== Delivery ====
The Chebs (without Jeremy) found the address relatively easily, with the help of signs and locals, and knocked on the door. They were greeted by an elderly lady, who seemed immediately suspicious of them. Through conversation with the lady, the Chebs divulged that they weren't supposed to have delivered the parcel to her, and were in fact supposed to have delivered the outer parcel to someone on K'Kirka who never showed; they had opened the outer crate to find the inner crate; they had also opened the inner crate and rummaged around in it, finding the white substance in the bottom. Bronston also once again attempted to blame any wrongdoings on Hahsh.

The lady refused delivery of the parcel, shut herself back in her house, and told The Chebs that she'd have to talk to her son. Soon after, a car and a van pulled up with 4 gangsters in suits and armed with tommy guns get out. After some questioning, they load The Chebs into the back of the van and drive off.

John Bronston

2023-08-11T15:18:00Z

John Bronston: John's species

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human and was raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=1/2 Human / Githiaski|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] [[Vlen Backett]] (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother) [[Vlen Backett]] (Uncle)(deceased)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston Jr was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of joyriding around the nearby systems. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthily as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft and subsequent crash suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill. Tvilti and Simon Bronston were in a coma for about 3 months following the crash of the Assualt Ship and were then sentenced to 7 years in prison for breaking into a military base and attempting to steal a craft.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

=== Uncle Vlen Backett ===
[[Vlen Backett]] (Formally Vlen "Brisket" Bronston) is the brother of John Sr and Uncle to John Jr and his siblings. He lives on Alell in the Regina sub-sector but doesn't spend much time there. He prefers to spend most of his time travelling across different systems. Every 6 months to a year, he would drop in on the Bronston residence to bring exotic gifts for his nephews and wow them with tales of his adventures. John Sr got on well with Vlen but Wzandyi was not so content and ever since John Jr was very young, Vlen would avoid visting when Wzandyi was back from a tour. The reason for the tension is not certain but Wzandyi has in the past brought up Vlen's excessive drug use and accussed him of being a 'Psionic's whore' in order to get passage to different systems. These claims have never been proven and Vlen insits he does 'honest work' such as being a deckhand or taking journalism contracts that send him far and wide.

Vlen changed his name to Backett when he went travelling and is quoted in an imperial newspaper as saying "My family name, "Brisket" Bronston was a burden when travelling around multiple systems. I'd give my full credentials and I'd be met with blank stares or laughter. No one would take me seriously.".

Vlen continued to visit his family on Asaazarkhu until Wzandyi's death, where he made the mistake of making a comment to his brother about her attitude towards him at her funeral. After a short fight that Vlen easily won, he was arrested by military personel and banished from Asaazarkhu. He would continue to write to his nephews and they would always reply and plan attempts to smuggle him onto the planet for a day or two so they could see him. This carried on until one day he made joke about stealing an Assault Ship from the nearby airbase to go and visit him. After about a year of complete silence, he now only receives letters John Jr who notified him of Uvalnus's death and Simon and Tvilti's subsequent imprisonment.

Vlen and John Jr would meet up when they could and brielfy ended up in the same prison. Up to the point of his death, Vlen continued to receive regular letters from John Jr updating him on the goings on.

== Military Employment and Incarceration ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===
At 22 years old, John joined the scouts and passed the flying exams with flying colours. His employment was fairly straight forward until, 3 years in, he witnessed a group of lizards explode from exposure to space. John had a vivid flashback to Uvalnus's death and went into shock, nearly dying. He was discharged on medical grounds but was quickly offered a role in the Navy as a pilot.

=== The Imperial Navy ===
John's first term in the Imperial Navy was fairly standard. He quickly became proficient in computers and piloting spacecraft. He was promoted to Able-Spacehand and decided to stay in the Navy. His next term was not so standard, although he did get a promotion to Petty Officer First Class. Every so often, John would sneak off while on post and not appear again for an hour or more. He was given a formal warning by his Commanding Officer, but John ultimetely ignored this and kept on doing it. After one of the spacehands noticed John disappearing off into his quarters during his post, he followed and caught John masturbating to what appeared to be interacial Human / Githiaski pornography. Not only was John continualy abandoning his post, but he had also stored pornography on his naval computer. This was seen as a great dishonour and the last straw. John was court-marshalled and given at least 4 years inprisonment. During his time in the holding cell before his trial, John met [[Gary Grey]], a highly intelligent engineer who refused to take off his helmet. The two exchanged skills and were able to learn a lot from each other. John's Father and siblings attended the hearing and his Father was quoted as loudly proclaiming "That's my boy", when the judge described the pornography John was keeping on the military PC's.

=== Prison ===
John was immedietely escorted to a large Imperial prison complex and spent a lot of the first year trying to become the hardest guy in the cell block. Countless noses were broken in John's conquest but he eventually gave up and decided to become a fixer. The owners of the broken noses weren't amused and John was subjected to a lot of shower related gaynal, which after some time, he began to enjoy and embraced it. Quoting "The Length of the Sausage" - "After a week, my arsehole became indistiguishable from a fist sized hole in a creamy sponge cake". John spent most of his prison life as a fixer and useing his expertise to break other inmates out. [[Vlen Backett]] met John in the prison during John's 3rd year for drug dealing, although he has always claimed his innocence, blaming the gangsters on Regina led by Venyasha. They spent 2 weeks catching up and hatching a plan to break Vlen out, which went off without a hitch. The day Vlen was broken out, a mysterious human by the name of [[Steve Connors]] was brought into the same cell as John. Steve constantly wore a cloak and was a good source of conversation for John. They exchanged skills and John vowed to break Steve out. Not long after, Steve was broken out the same way Vlen was and it was successful. John was released from prison after serving his minimum term of 4 years after finding a really good lawyer. The breakouts were never attributed to him and none of the escapee's were ever found again.

After John's release, he was given a message to report to K'kirka to deliver a package to an unknown party. It was there that he met up again with Steve and Gary, as well as psionic [[Qenzh Erreqif]] and [[Jeremy Jeremy]].

== The Calendula Report ==

== Wypoch and The Ligma ==

== Regina ==

John Bronston

2022-10-04T12:49:15Z

John Bronston: Pre-game terms

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human and was raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] [[Vlen Backett]] (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother) [[Vlen Backett]] (Uncle)(deceased)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston Jr was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of joyriding around the nearby systems. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthily as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft and subsequent crash suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill. Tvilti and Simon Bronston were in a coma for about 3 months following the crash of the Assualt Ship and were then sentenced to 7 years in prison for breaking into a military base and attempting to steal a craft.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

=== Uncle Vlen Backett ===
[[Vlen Backett]] (Formally Vlen "Brisket" Bronston) is the brother of John Sr and Uncle to John Jr and his siblings. He lives on Alell in the Regina sub-sector but doesn't spend much time there. He prefers to spend most of his time travelling across different systems. Every 6 months to a year, he would drop in on the Bronston residence to bring exotic gifts for his nephews and wow them with tales of his adventures. John Sr got on well with Vlen but Wzandyi was not so content and ever since John Jr was very young, Vlen would avoid visting when Wzandyi was back from a tour. The reason for the tension is not certain but Wzandyi has in the past brought up Vlen's excessive drug use and accussed him of being a 'Psionic's whore' in order to get passage to different systems. These claims have never been proven and Vlen insits he does 'honest work' such as being a deckhand or taking journalism contracts that send him far and wide.

Vlen changed his name to Backett when he went travelling and is quoted in an imperial newspaper as saying "My family name, "Brisket" Bronston was a burden when travelling around multiple systems. I'd give my full credentials and I'd be met with blank stares or laughter. No one would take me seriously.".

Vlen continued to visit his family on Asaazarkhu until Wzandyi's death, where he made the mistake of making a comment to his brother about her attitude towards him at her funeral. After a short fight that Vlen easily won, he was arrested by military personel and banished from Asaazarkhu. He would continue to write to his nephews and they would always reply and plan attempts to smuggle him onto the planet for a day or two so they could see him. This carried on until one day he made joke about stealing an Assault Ship from the nearby airbase to go and visit him. After about a year of complete silence, he now only receives letters John Jr who notified him of Uvalnus's death and Simon and Tvilti's subsequent imprisonment.

Vlen and John Jr would meet up when they could and brielfy ended up in the same prison. Up to the point of his death, Vlen continued to receive regular letters from John Jr updating him on the goings on.

== Military Employment and Incarceration ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===
At 22 years old, John joined the scouts and passed the flying exams with flying colours. His employment was fairly straight forward until, 3 years in, he witnessed a group of lizards explode from exposure to space. John had a vivid flashback to Uvalnus's death and went into shock, nearly dying. He was discharged on medical grounds but was quickly offered a role in the Navy as a pilot.

=== The Imperial Navy ===
John's first term in the Imperial Navy was fairly standard. He quickly became proficient in computers and piloting spacecraft. He was promoted to Able-Spacehand and decided to stay in the Navy. His next term was not so standard, although he did get a promotion to Petty Officer First Class. Every so often, John would sneak off while on post and not appear again for an hour or more. He was given a formal warning by his Commanding Officer, but John ultimetely ignored this and kept on doing it. After one of the spacehands noticed John disappearing off into his quarters during his post, he followed and caught John masturbating to what appeared to be interacial Human / Githiaski pornography. Not only was John continualy abandoning his post, but he had also stored pornography on his naval computer. This was seen as a great dishonour and the last straw. John was court-marshalled and given at least 4 years inprisonment. During his time in the holding cell before his trial, John met [[Gary Grey]], a highly intelligent engineer who refused to take off his helmet. The two exchanged skills and were able to learn a lot from each other. John's Father and siblings attended the hearing and his Father was quoted as loudly proclaiming "That's my boy", when the judge described the pornography John was keeping on the military PC's.

=== Prison ===
John was immedietely escorted to a large Imperial prison complex and spent a lot of the first year trying to become the hardest guy in the cell block. Countless noses were broken in John's conquest but he eventually gave up and decided to become a fixer. The owners of the broken noses weren't amused and John was subjected to a lot of shower related gaynal, which after some time, he began to enjoy and embraced it. Quoting "The Length of the Sausage" - "After a week, my arsehole became indistiguishable from a fist sized hole in a creamy sponge cake". John spent most of his prison life as a fixer and useing his expertise to break other inmates out. [[Vlen Backett]] met John in the prison during John's 3rd year for drug dealing, although he has always claimed his innocence, blaming the gangsters on Regina led by Venyasha. They spent 2 weeks catching up and hatching a plan to break Vlen out, which went off without a hitch. The day Vlen was broken out, a mysterious human by the name of [[Steve Connors]] was brought into the same cell as John. Steve constantly wore a cloak and was a good source of conversation for John. They exchanged skills and John vowed to break Steve out. Not long after, Steve was broken out the same way Vlen was and it was successful. John was released from prison after serving his minimum term of 4 years after finding a really good lawyer. The breakouts were never attributed to him and none of the escapee's were ever found again.

After John's release, he was given a message to report to K'kirka to deliver a package to an unknown party. It was there that he met up again with Steve and Gary, as well as psionic [[Qenzh Erreqif]] and [[Jeremy Jeremy]].

== The Calendula Report ==

== Wypoch and The Ligma ==

== Regina ==

John Bronston

2022-09-02T14:36:42Z

John Bronston: Uncle Vlen

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human and was raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother) Vlen Backett (Uncle)(deceased)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston Jr was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of joyriding around the nearby systems. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthily as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft and subsequent crash suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill. Tvilti and Simon Bronston were in a coma for about 3 months following the crash of the Assualt Ship and were then sentenced to 7 years in prison for breaking into a military base and attempting to steal a craft.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

=== Uncle Vlen Backett ===
Vlen Backett (Formally Vlen "Brisket" Bronston) is the brother of John Sr and Uncle to John Jr and his siblings. He lives on Alell in the Regina sub-sector but doesn't spend much time there. He prefers to spend most of his time travelling across different systems. Every 6 months to a year, he would drop in on the Bronston residence to bring exotic gifts for his nephews and wow them with tales of his adventures. John Sr got on well with Vlen but Wzandyi was not so content and ever since John Jr was very young, Vlen would avoid visting when Wzandyi was back from a tour. The reason for the tension is not certain but Wzandyi has in the past brought up Vlen's excessive drug use and accussed him of being a 'Psionic's whore' in order to get passage to different systems. These claims have never been proven and Vlen insits he does 'honest work' such as being a deckhand or taking journalism contracts that send him far and wide.

Vlen changed his name to Backett when he went travelling and is quoted in an imperial newspaper as saying "My family name, "Brisket" Bronston was a burden when travelling around multiple systems. I'd give my full credentials and I'd be met with blank stares or laughter. No one would take me seriously.".

Vlen continued to visit his family on Asaazarkhu until Wzandyi's death, where he made the mistake of making a comment to his brother about her attitude towards him at her funeral. After a short fight that Vlen easily won, he was arrested by military personel and banished from Asaazarkhu. He would continue to write to his nephews and they would always reply and plan attempts to smuggle him onto the planet for a day or two so they could see him. This carried on until one day he made joke about stealing an Assault Ship from the nearby airbase to go and visit him. After about a year of complete silence, he now only receives letters John Jr who notified him of Uvalnus's death and Simon and Tvilti's subsequent imprisonment.

Vlen and John Jr would meet up when they could and brielfy ended up in the same prison. Up to the point of his death, Vlen continued to receive regular letters from John Jr updating him on the goings on.

== Military Employment and Incarceration ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===
At 22 years old, John joined the scouts and passed the flying exams with flying colours. His employment was fairly straight forward until, 3 years in, he witnessed a group of lizards explode from exposure to space. John had a vivid flashback to Uvalnus's death and went into shock, nearly dying. He was discharged on medical grounds but was quickly offered a role in the Navy as a pilot.

=== The Imperial Navy ===

=== Prison ===

== The Calendula Report ==

== Wypoch and The Ligma ==

== Regina ==

John Bronston

2022-09-02T05:42:25Z

John Bronston:

John Bronston

2022-09-02T04:09:49Z

John Bronston:

John Bronston

2022-09-02T04:01:51Z

John Bronston:

John Bronston

2022-09-02T03:58:15Z

John Bronston:

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of selling it on the black market. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthily as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill. Tvilti and Simon Bronston were in a coma for about 3 months following the crash of the Assualt Ship and were then sentenced to 7 years in prison for breaking into a military base and attempting to steal a craft.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

== Military Employment and Incarceration ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===
At 22 years old, John joined the scouts and passed the flying exams with flying colours. His employment was fairly straight forward until, 3 years in, he witnessed a group of lizards explode from exposure to space. John had a vivid flashback to Uvalnus's death and went into shock, nearly dying. He was discharged on medical grounds but was quickly offered a role in the Navy as a pilot.

=== The Imperial Navy ===

=== Prison ===

== The Calendula Report ==

== Wypoch and The Ligma ==

== Regina ==

John Bronston

2022-09-02T03:51:24Z

John Bronston:

John Bronston

2022-09-02T03:46:08Z

John Bronston: updates

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of selling it on the black market. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthily as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill. Tvilti and Simon Bronston were in a coma for about 3 months following the crash of the Assualt Ship and were then sentenced to 7 years in prison for breaking into a military base and attempting to steal a craft.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

== Military Employment ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===
At 22 years old, John joined the scouts and passed the flying exams with flying colours. His employment was fairly straight forward until, 3 years in, he witnessed a group of lizards explode from exposure to space. John had a vivid flashback to Uvalnus's death and went into shock, nearly dying. He was discharged on medical grounds but was quickly offered a role in the Navy as a pilot.

=== The Imperial Navy ===

John Bronston

2022-09-02T03:21:40Z

John Bronston:

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of selling it on the black market. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthitly as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill. Tvilti and Simon Bronston were sentenced to 7 years in prison for breaking into a Military base and attempting to steal a craft.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

== Military Employment ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===

John Bronston

2022-09-02T03:18:29Z

John Bronston: Updates

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of selling it on the black market. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthitly as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

The aftermath of the failed theft suprisingly didn't result in prison time for John. After he regained consciousness from a year long coma, he was met by the Marshal-Commondant of from the Imperial Marines who realised the potential of John's piloting skills and in honour of Wzandyi, who the Marshal-Commondant knew well, offered John the chance to fly for the military. John accepted the offer, but had sustained minor brain damage in the ship theft which caused him to go a bit loopy and refer to himself in the 3rd person, as well as making his voice sound very shrill.

For the next 2 years, John worked as the Marshal-Commondant's secratery before becoming old enough to join the Scouts at 22.

== Military Employment ==

=== The Imperial Scout Service ===

John Bronston

2022-09-02T02:42:31Z

John Bronston: Johns Early Life

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu, home of the squid race the Githiaski. He's currently part of a group of Idiots who are adventuring through space.

{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=Unknown|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]|aliases=Sausage Fucking Idiot|birthplace=Asaazarkhu|family=Wzandyi Bronston (Mother)(deceased) John 'Pork Chop' Bronston Sr (Father) Simon 'Lamb Shank' Bronston (Brother) Uvalnus 'Tender Loin' Bronston (Brother)(deceased) Tvilti 'Faggot' Bronston (Brother)}}

== Early Life ==

=== Childhood ===
John Bronston was born and raised on the planet Asaazarkhu with his 3 Githiaski half brothers, Tvilti, Uvalnus and Simon Bronston. John is the second youngest sibling, only followed by Tvilti. His Mother, Wzandyi Bronston is Githiaski and a Force Commander in the Githiaski section of the Imperial Marines. She was cold and didn't care much for her children, except her first born, Simon, who she favours above the others. Due to her occupation she doesn't spend a lot of time at home so John was primarily raised by his human Father, John Bronston Sr, who tends to go by the ailias, 'Pork Chop'. Pork Chop Brontson was a compassionate and highly intelligent man who devoted his spare time to his kids, raising them while his wife was away on military tours for 6 months to a year at a time.

John Bronston Jr was given the alias 'Sausage' at the age of 3 by Pork Chop who wanted to carry on the odd tradition of naming their son's after cuts or products of meat. The origin of this naming convention comes from ancient Terran tradition of growing local animals for execution and consumption. The Bronston family owned a chain of these shops and have been following this tradition for thousands of years.

John was homeschooled by his father while his siblings went to a Githiaski military boarding school in a nearby city. John spent a lot of time with his father and they often went on day trips to go fishing.

=== Wzandyi Bronston's Death and Assault Ship Theft ===
At the age of 14, John's family received the news that his mother was killed in action while fighting Psionics. Due to the nature of the situation, they weren't told any further details. John Sr became very distant and the lack of income forced Sausage and his siblings into a life of petty crimes.

After 5 years of just about scraping by and being in and out of juvenile detention for petty theft, John and his siblings thought it would be a good idea to steal a military Assault Shuttle from an imperial base near by with the intention of selling it on the black market. John calls dibs on pilot, Uvalnus calls co-pilot with Tvilti and Simon on the guns. Taken from John's biography "The Length of the Sausage" - "We set out in the middle of a winters night and climbed a damaged area of fence around the perimeter of the airbase. About a kilometere from the point we entered the base, we saw a line of Assault Shuttles parked up on the aviation apron and stealthily made our way over (well as stealthitly as 3 squids can) and broke our way into the Shuttle on the end of the line. At this point, we heard a shout from behind and saw a Human rifleman running towards us from a couple of hundred meters away. I, although having no previous experience on aircraft, quickly started it up and began to lift off the ground. The military presence around us had massively increased and we start getting shot from all sides by light arms fire. Simon and Tvilti were struggling with the ships guns and quickly give up to take cover. 50ft off the ground, I began to transition into horizontal flight before a noise sounding like a large *crack* was heard and Uvalnus's head exploded. I wasn't even able to process what happened before I noticed blood pouring down the left side of my face and neck. The bullet that killed my brother had deeply scarred the side of my head and I blacked out. I was never able to grow hair on that side again."

Template:Infobox player

2022-09-02T01:34:49Z

John Bronston:

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John Bronston

2022-09-02T01:31:34Z

John Bronston: John

John Bronston

2022-09-02T00:39:40Z

John Bronston:

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human. A great human. He is the only person in history to be both the prison hardman and the prison bitch.{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Backett (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=The Ligma|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]}}

John Bronston

2022-09-01T19:20:10Z

John Bronston:

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human. A great human. He is the only person in history to be both the prison hardman and the prison bitch.{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]] Vlen Becket (deceased)|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=The Ligma|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]}}

John Bronston

2022-09-01T19:00:22Z

John Bronston: Stats

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human. A great human. He is the only person in history to be both the prison hardman and the prison bitch.{{Template:Infobox player|str=8|dex=9|end=7|int=9|edu=7|soc=3|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]]|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=The Ligma|status=Alive|membership=[[The Group]]}}

Jeremy Jeremy

2022-09-01T17:51:37Z

John Bronston: Grammer

Jeremy Jeremy is a human. Jeremy suffers from chronic bouts of T-Pose Disease. This peculiar disease forces the victims joints to stiffen in such a way that their bodies resemble the letter 'T'. For unknown reasons it also makes the victims hover inches off the ground and glide around, while remaining in the 'T' state.

Jeremy Jeremy

2022-09-01T17:50:58Z

John Bronston:

Jeremy Jeremy is a human. Jeremy suffers from chronic bouts of T-Pose Disease. This peculiar disease forces the victims joints to stiffen in such a way that they're bodies resemble the letter 'T'. For unknown reasons it also makes the victims hover inches off the ground and glide around, while remaining in the 'T' state.

Jeremy Jeremy

2022-09-01T17:50:17Z

John Bronston: T-Pose Disease

John Bronston

2022-09-01T12:36:47Z

John Bronston:

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human. A great human. He is the only person in history to be both the prison hardman and the prison bitch.{{Template:Infobox npc|str=|dex=|end=|int=|edu=|soc=|species=Human|gender=Male|age=38|image=|caption=John being Fabulous|profession=Former Naval Officer|allies=[[The Group]]|adverseries=[[Dalglee Hahsh]]|locationcurrent=The Ligma|status=Alive}}

John Bronston

2022-09-01T12:36:16Z

John Bronston: Added table on the right

John Bronston

2022-08-31T21:12:35Z

John Bronston: Johns back

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human. A great human. He is the only person in history to be both the prison hardman and the prison bitch.

John Bronston

2022-08-31T21:00:49Z

John Bronston: The truth

John "Sausage" Bronston is a human (The best human, followed closely by Steve)